How do I find myself a 27-year-old Argentine to frolic on the beach with? Hit one over the head with a rock and hope he falls in love with the first person he sees after waking up? That's how love works right? You go unconscious and the first face you see when you come to...eternal devotion. With my luck I'd bend over to help some old crazy homeless guy who got hit by a car and his eyes would fix on me and...well fuck it, I'd take it. As long as he wasn't TOO crazy. I can stand cackling crazy and mumbling crazy and even ranting-at-spiders crazy. If he starts bringing home stray animals or cutting holes in my underwear for no reason...well I guess I could learn to live with that too. My standards are incredibly low. He better keep his hands off my toasted almond fudge ice cream though. And no fucking Mitt Romney shit.
Anyway congrats to Sharon Stone on her 27-year-old Argentine boyfriend. Sharon's holding up pretty well for 70. Still has nice legs. Obviously her skills in the sack are off the charts. She can make you erupt just by giving it a stern look and snapping her fingers.
