It's now time to address Bruce Jenner's face. I like it. It's sleek and sporty. And the scar is a nice touch. Chicks dig scars, especially big nasty, stitchy fresh-looking ones. I actually think Bruce needs to tighten that thing up more. That skin can pull back at least another two inches. There isn't enough definition around the cheekbones and eye sockets yet. He also needs to smooth out that forehead. Don't skimp on the Botox Bruce. Pump that shit in there. Fuck needles, cut a hole and shove a hose in. Perfection is within reach Bruce. 20 or 30 more procedures and you'll be at your goal. You can do it, ace!
Only one thing bothers me about this picture: the tiny heart earring. Kinda gay don't you think Bruce? Especially right next to that tough-looking scar. Maybe I'm wrong but I think it just sends a mixed message. The scar says "I am a tough hombre who could star in a movie about a famous Cuban drug kingpin," but then the earring says "I am a dainty fellow who could help a famous Cuban drug kingpin redecorate his drug mansion." So which is it Bruce? Are you snorting mounds of coke, banging hot chicks and blowing dudes away with your giant gun, or are you walking around in Uggs with a tiny dog in your purse and "Hot Stuff" written across the ass of your absurdly tight jeans? Signal us which version of yourself we're supposed to believe in, Bruce. If you're Girly Bruce, put in purple feather hair extensions. If you're Bad-Ass Bruce, do nothing.
